My dear, if there’s one thing you must do for yourself in this world, it’s trust your judgements. People’s opinions on a matter don’t have to align with yours for yours to matter. Sometimes, you just have to trust your own judgement and hold onto your beliefs like ants clinging to sugar.
You believe marrying without financial stability is unwise, but because twenty-nine others argue, “Love is enough!” or “You’ll figure it out later!”, you waver. You abandon your stance—not because you’ve deeply considered how their advice fits the life you’ve lived for twenty years, but simply because the crowd disagrees. (Hmm… something smells off. Low self-esteem?)
Your experiences are valid. Your opinions are valid. If you make a mistake today, correct it tomorrow. Why assume others’ opinions are infallible? Why are they called opinions if not to remind you that yours holds weight too? Own your perspective unapologetically.
Take this: You’re a geography student, and seniors warn, “Don’t bother contesting your grades—the faculty never remarks results.” Blah, blah, blah. Ignore that. It’s your life. Approach the course coordinator respectfully, present your case logically, and hear the truth directly from them. Maybe nothing can be done—or maybe there’s a chance. At least you tried for yourself. Your class rep won’t always fight your battles.
Oh! I get you. you scored 63 and 74, while your classmate aced 82 and 79. You asked, “How do you study? Videos? Six rounds of notes?” Then, you forced yourself into her mold—despite knowing textbooks work better for you—only to crash to 49. Stop. You have a brain. Find your winning formula, refine it, and invest in it. Her path isn’t yours. Hold unto your judgement.
You’re at a party—invited, no less—and when the food drops, the server skips you. You shrug: “It’s just jollof rice and turkey. I can order this myself for ₦5,000. Why stress?”
My dear, snap out of it. Walk up to that server and politely demand what’s yours. You’re not being shameless; you’re claiming what’s rightfully due to you. This isn’t about the food—it’s about refusing to be overlooked in your own damn life. Speak up. Trust your judgement. You have all right over that food. You should not allow the waiter to skip you. Should I even be saying this? Don’t you love yourself?
Hold onto your own opinions. You can’t mimic everyone’s style—you’re not a chameleon. If your approach fails, analyze it, adjust, and keep improving. That’s how you stand for yourself.
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