I Fought My Demons And Relinquished My Soul

Pinterest: Chioma

I have felt a wave of helplessness for the past days, it has made me weak that my demons are almost making it through. I wish my demons were tangible like the little boys in the compound that shout when I try to write. Maybe then I could smack them hard in the mouth and get this over with. But my demons aren’t like Muiz or Abdulsalam. 

My demons are etched in my memory as past mishaps; the past never goes away. At least, mine hasn’t. This is just another Tuesday of me fighting my demons, but this time I am not doing it alone; Chioma is with me, one of my mishaps. 

My laptop is the only light I have in this room as I type away so you could read. Maybe when you do, this insatiable want for perfection might fade. For now, it feels indelible.  

Chioma is on my bed. Her dark legs, laps, stomach open to me and my demons to see. She is awake and naked with her full breasts and succulent lips, but I rather type. She hates it, but I can’t help it. These demons must go first. Maybe then I could commit sin, or as MJ will call it, coitus.  

A month ago, things might have been different. The lust that coursed through us was…

I met Chioma at church. My guys decided to make a detour on August 5 and attend our school’s catholic church. 

“The girls there are bam!” Tope had shouted when I was trying to put on my native attire. They never tell you but putting on agbada is a big pain in the ass. 

“Omo. That girl…what’s her name?? Chioma goes there now.” Mj added. 

Chioma? I thought. The boys had always talked about her since they saw her at a party a while back. Chioma this, Chioma that. It was crazy how they couldn’t keep her off their tongues. I got a bit intrigued. 

Our dress up was fast. In 30 minutes we were ready and off for morning mass. The service…sorry, mass was weird. It was different from the drum beating and choir singing pattern I was used to in pentecostal churches. It was a bit more serene. Weirdly, it felt like they were the “serious” Christians. I spaced out when the priest started his exaltation—another sermon on staying pure. 

The Catholics know how to use their wardrobe, and Tope didn’t lie. The girls were bad bad. Tope, MJ, and I sat under the canopy outside. My friends entertained guests, but I kept my airpods trying to see if there were any good songs on Davido’s Timeless album. 

There was none.

“Topeeee,” A girl made out a shriek. Tope jumped off his seat to hug her. His chair almost toppled over that it got my attention. When he let her go, I saw her face and that instant I knew I was looking at Chioma. 

I would make a fuss too if I had met Chioma at a party. Her gown’s slit went all the way to her thighs showing all of its freshness. If she wore this to church, I am curious to see what she wears to parties. I could swear my legs moved on their own at this point to meet her. 

“Hi, I am Chidozie, but you call me Dozie”

She smiled and said her name was Chioma. And I replied, 

“The gods must have been effortly good”

Stunned that I knew the meaning of her name, we started to talk. She asked what my name meant and I told her. Her smile was radiant. She gets more beautiful when she smiles. We exchanged numbers and I pecked her goodbye. If I could go back in time, I would have taken the next exit the instant I saw her. But I deep dived. 

Chioma was a solid 5’5, which went well with my 6’2 frame. But it wasn’t her height or smile that caught my attention. It was her body. She was shapely, or like Galilei Galileo would say it, her earth was round. We went out a couple of times. She preferred cinemas; she said it was the perfect place to kiss her man without any eyes. But she never kissed me at the cinema, but her hands never left my laps. 

My pods were in my ears as I listened to some Kendrick Lamar while I thought of her. There was no doubt she was the most beautiful girl I had seen. Her voice even captures a bit of her look. I curled up thinking about how I could get a girl as pretty as her into my home. How I could ask her to look at me while I stare down into her eyes and make her breath haza—

“You are thinking about her, huh?” Tope’s voice jolted me into reality. 

“Let me give you a word of advice. She is not what you think.” Tope continued after a long sigh. 

“What do you mean?” 

He didn’t answer. But I waved away the thought and went outside to call her. The moon was full tonight and I wanted to ask if she could see it. I dialed her number that I had stored as Chizzy. She didn’t like that I gave her a guy’s name, but it made her laugh. The phone rang twice then she picked it. 

“Hey, stranger” she said with so much breath. 

“Hey, Chizzy. Was just thinking of you”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *