He swears by the grave of
his great grandfather’s cousin’s wife
That when the stars of the sky,
Align in one perfect line
When it rains for a whole week,
Without stop, in the Sahara.
When he can win a race against a cheetah
Standing on his palms, juggling a knife
When the moringa tree in your backyard
Bears an orange and a pawpaw
When the sun goes blue
And the moon goes pink
Then he will marry you.
You, the love of his life
Whom he loves more than
Anything else in the world.
But there is one star
Not exactly in line, you see
And it only rained in the Sahara
Six days and twenty hours
And he can barely run a 100m dash
While standing on his two feet
And the moringa tree
Bears only pawpaws
The moon is just a little too green
And the sun is just too red
So you two can’t get married now
Even though you’ve been engaged for years
So now, my dear, you’ve officially become
The Lord of the rings
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