A simple guide, especially for agoraphobes, to survive in some of the world’s most crowded places.
Introduction
Markets. These places test your ability to exercise patience, protecting your personal space without having a sudden mental breakdown. Whether it’s the busiest market in Lagos, Balogun, or a packed supermarket in your area, you might still get overstimulated.
I salute those navigating through marketplaces like it’s just another typical day. For the rest of us who hate being outside the confines of our home, markets seem like a battleground where everyone and everything is a potential threat. But we can’t gloss over the fact that markets are necessary evils.
So, how do you survive? How do you keep your acts together and your head up without losing money? Here is an excellent guide made just for you.
Survival Tips
1. Don’t Go Blindly, Plan Ahead
In secondary school, one of my teachers told us, “He who fails to plan, plans to fail”, and this still holds in this case. If you don’t want to be swallowed by the overwhelming stress, you might want to have a list of items and a budget. Marketplaces are not where you have your leisure hikes, so don’t fall into the trap of having no plan. And if you don’t take heed, congratulations, you just signed up for losing your mind and money.
2. Choose The Right Time
This is a golden rule: never go to the market during the busiest hours. Body go tell you, literally. Imagine squeezing your way through the crowd and settling for just any seller. So, ensure you go well before the sun starts smiling (10 am) and probably 6 pm.
3. Don’t Attract Unnecessary Attention, Dress For The Occasion
Don’t set yourself up! Those sellers will think you’re Otedola and have your pockets emptied quickly. This is war, not a runway, okay? That’s why you need comfortable flat shoes, as you will be on your feet long. In addition, get a crossbody bag to keep your money close to you and away from potential pickpockets. What about jewellery? Keep it nil to minimal.
4. NO!!!
I know it’s not so easy, especially if you rarely say it, but this word is for you unless you want to get things unnecessarily. I promise you, those sellers will “whyne” you, after all, they need to get their daily bread too. You should expect phrases like;
“See fresh fish! Just touch am, you go like am.”
“Aunty, fine girl, come and check!”
“Fine sister, this dress go fit you well.”
Please don’t let these get to your head; politely shake your head laterally and keep walking. If you snooze, you lose all your money. If you smile too much, you give them a “thumbs up” and let them know you’re loaded. Just look serious, and let them know you’re there for “business” and you know what you’re doing.
5. Breathe In & Out
Don’t be too anxious that you forget this fact, please; it helps keep you alive. You don’t want to end up fainting. Like, imagine the embarrassment after! So, take slow, deep breaths, and pause when you have to. Ultimately, avoid allowing chaos to determine your pace.
6. Have “Customers”
In a battleground, you need to identify those who will keep you safe by all means. That’s why you need sellers you can trust and always turn to. And just in case that person doesn’t show up, have a backup in place.
7. Have a Partner with You
Get a market pro to care for the bargaining while you keep sane. Trust me, this is so much less exhausting.
8. Carry “Change”
Ensure to have some loose change with you to avoid stories that touch like:
“Ah sister, I no get change o,” says the woman with tons of smaller denominations lying in her pocket.
Also, like in the game of cards, learn not to reveal all your cash. You might drop those by mistake or even get cheated.
9. Stay Hydrated & Have A Reward System
Get that cold drink, and celebrate your victory. You deserve it, jor.
Conclusion
Marketplaces aren’t for everybody, but following this simple guide might help you become a pro in no time. Now, go to Balogun market and charge in like the warrior you are!
What’s your survival strategy in marketplaces? I would love to hear from you, so drop a comment now!
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