You: I love you.
Your Daddy: Noted.
If you have been on Twitter, you must have seen at least a hundred accounts quote this tweet:
The responses are wild. Some are savage, some are painful, but most of them are just plain hilarious. Across all responses, a few types of these conversations have repeated themselves severally. These conversations reflect the kind of relationship these people have with their parents. Here is a list of seven of the different types of conversations that stood out. Which of these categories do you think you and your parents belong to?
The BCs All-Day Everyday
Dad ❤ ️: Please forward to 200 people if you want to have a great week. According to…
You: Alright, sir.
Secretly, you want to block the man but blood is thicker than broadcast messages. Every conversation in this online relationship stems from a ridiculous BC sent by your parents. They send you the most incredulous things and sometimes even suspect that they believe these things.
And believe it or not, your parents will always surprise you with the kind of BCs they can unearth from Facebook. Today, it’s why you should never enter maruwa with your left leg, tomorrow it’s that black nose masks are signs of the devil. But it’s all out of love and if you don’t respond fast enough, they can change it for you.
The Call and Response
You: Mummy, good afternoon ma.
Your Mummy: How much do you want?
What an old man can see sitting down, the youth cannot see standing up. That is an African proverb and you best believe that it holds some truth. So, if you enter your father’s DM and start with pleasantries, I hope you know that he knows why you’re there.
And there are those who no longer have shame and their parents already know this. The only conversation they have with their parents is call and response. “Daddy, I need money”, “Noted.”
The Real Nigerian Ones
How do you know a Nigerian parent? Hint, they don’t have feelings. Even if they do, they definitely don’t express them well. For instance, has your father ever told you that he loves you? Exactly.
Another way is by how they react to your pictures. You will see things like “God bless you” after you send them your finest picture. I mean, who else will send you a thumbs-up in reaction to your iphone selfie? Only one category of people- Nigerian parents.
The One You May Never Experience…
…if you are truly Nigerian, that is.”I have love at home” is a common saying on Twitter these days. It refers to people who are well-loved and who have been told just how much by their parents. This is where fake Nigerian parents fall because I refuse to believe that any parent who can actually communicate with you is Nigerian. It’s a disguise, trace it back to your ancestors, and you may find out that they were not from here.
What do you mean a Nigerian parent sent you an epistle? Never heard of it. Every child in Nigeria is searching for this species of parents. And those who have them are counting their blessings.
The Formal Letter Ones
Will chat later.
As how? The formality in these conversations is usually from the side of the parents. It can be endearing at times and, other times frustrating, especially for their kids. But mostly, it’s just funny.
And their favorite word? “Noted.”
The Ones Who Always Have Something to Fight About
You: I want to get a piercing
Your mother: Make sure you get another mother too.
These are the “rebellious” kids who have conservative parents. They just don’t work together. You want to get a tattoo of a snake. Hehe, maybe you have another mother apart from the African one. She will definitely ask you that question. She will still love you though but you may sleep outside for a while.
The Light Banter
This is where savage parents fall, with kids who often match their energy. You can call these parents classy because they are definitely keeping up with the times. These are the parents that can joke with you and easily put you in your place in the same breath.
And you can even banter with them. Try this with another Nigerian mother and you will find a slipper hurtling towards you at top speed from Ikirun.
So, those are the seven categories of conversations with Nigerian Parents. Which of them do you and your parents belong to? Do let me know in the comment section. Please don’t forget to like and share as well. You can enjoy other posts under love and relationship here. You can also click on this link to take you to the original tweet.