Relationships; when quantity trumps quality

On the hierarchy of needs, a sense of belonging is one of the most important. A sense of belonging arises when an individual interacts with other people in his environment, builds connections based on shared interests, and maintains these connections.

The question is, how are these deep connections built? One might presume it is those rare moments of vulnerability that happen with a select few. It is those people you can share things with that you might consider to be in your inner circle.

Expressing your truest self does not happen on cue, though. Some people walk into your life for a short period and disappear shortly after. In that one or few encounters, you experience a deep connection, that “where have you been my entire life?” moment. But do you consider these people your closest allies?

According to research, it takes about 40-60 hours of time spent together to form a casual friendship and 200 hours or more to become best friends.

When you think about it, it is those people you see every day and joke on irrelevant matters that you feel closest to. Here, quantity seems to take the win. The more times you see a friend, the more you pick up the little details, leading to more opportunities for “quality time” to set in.

Both are important in the real sense of it, and both are bound to happen. What is important is the people you are spending most of your time with and the connections you build in the process.

Or what do you think? Kindly comment below.


It’s the season of love. Take time to let people know you care about them and as much as you can — even after red leaves the air.

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